A warning... The following post is about a long list of "How many ____ does it take to change a light bulb" jokes created by Tristan Korthals Altes of BuildingGreen... Unless you're REALLY into the green construction industry and all the people associated with it, you're probably going to hate me for sending you to this post about Green Building Jokes. They pretty much target everyone... owner reps, code officials, "William McDonoughs", and even USGBC Cascadia members (<-those guys are apparently pretty hardcore).
My favorite joke? My own of course! (Nobody said RealLifeLEED was modest, even after so many servings of humble pie) ...It's buried in the comments, but I'll save you the trouble:
Q. How many LEED Reviewers does it take to screw in a light-bulb?
A. One, but it will take three months to decide if the light-bulb changing procedures comply with the applicable referenced standard. During this time they must determine if the supporting documentation of this compliance also includes images of the broken bulb and a schematic illustration of the light-bulb replacement strategy. Then they must wait about two weeks for the design team's response to the clarification request for a Sustainable Light-Bulb Purchasing and Replacement Plan asking for an outline of how custodial staff are trained to comply with the requirements of the plan. After three more weeks of review a final decision is issued that states that light-bulb replacement is anticipated, assuming no changes to the status of the light-bulb occur in the construction phase.